i guess i never did post about being home. which is strange because its the last time i remember being so excited about what was happening in my life. i loved being home so much, wouldn't change any of it, and seriously can't think of a bad memory. seeing my friends was amazing, it wasn't even weird. felt normal, like it had just been a couple weeks since we'd seen each other. still now, its a concept thats incredibly hard for me to grasp that we're all on different tracks, we're not linked and its unpredictable what's going to happen to all of us. being home made me forget that because i saw everyone all at once. for some reason i always get the feeling that time stops when im away and it starts again when i go back, but thats so untrue. silly of me to think that way, actually. why wouldnt my friends be making their way in the world? theyre probably better off than me, but whatever.

things i did when i was home

1. jumped off the arboretum bridge with crazy chelise
2. went rock climbing with ian carl and chelise, did a rope swing into frrrreezing river water
3. went cliff jumping (granted i only jumped twice..) with chelise in bellingham
4. visited danny in his new house in bellingham, spent the night, drove back and got my first ever speeding ticket
5. awesome picnic at gasworks park
6. burned my hair and eyelashes off with logan at the beach
7. went on a cruise with my family, just miles in front of hurricane irene
8. fell asleep on nik's sharkboat woke up and we were stuck on the water with a dead engine

blahhhh i have to prepare an english lesson now

it goes on

i'm not sure of what i'm sure of anymore, but don't you hate how that sounds? like an existentialist bratty teenager so overly whelmed with mundane life.. etc

letters to people

dear ____
i miss you so much, and you are the single most important person in my life. i know i haven't been acting like it lately but it's just because i've been so damn selfish

dear ___ and ___
i gotta learn to get less annoyed by the two of you... but christ could you tone it down?

dear ____
makes me sad but i'm starting to not care about you, thought we were invincible

majority of people i know,
youre annoying as hell but i guess i probably am, too

dear ____
i think i try to get myself to care less because i don't feel you caring about me